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Post Sat Feb 12, 2005 7:42 pm


Greetings ladies, gentlemen, boys, girls and any aliens.

I hope -someone- checks this post.

I am currently writing a sci-fi story that is loosely based off of Anne McCaffre's (bless her talented imagination) brainship series.

I have already shown Orillion and he says it is good. I'm still not completely sure if he is just being kind, trying to shield me from the brutal truth.

Anyways, here is a tiny section of my story. First, I chose this section because it contains both main characters and a little of their interactions together. That, and I am a bit paranoid about people stealing my work. I had a bad experience with that.

"Mine is the story of the end time. I know this because the third Core has been found."
-Karan S'Jet

Brain/Brawn pair of Freelancer

Post Sat Feb 12, 2005 7:43 pm

I realize that some parts will be confusing, so at the end I put a little more information

But enough about myself and my thoughts. Here is the section; I've entitled the section (chapter?) "Flying Lesson".

“So tell me Ty, where is this group we’re picking up, who are they and where are they going?” ask Emily from the main chair. She was lazily curled in the chair, what would have been awkward position had it not been for the foam. Her head rested on one armrest with her recently brushed hair hanging down towards the deck. She had somehow managed to curl her legs under herself. She hugged herself, almost protectively; her arms crossed her chest. On her elfin face she wore a peacefully expression, with a small smile on her lips.
“You know Em, I’m sure that Central would disapprove of…um…sitting like that.” He paused and continued on in a rush, “I’m sure they have a rule against it. I mean; we are in CenDip, and therefore representatives for Central Worlds. What if we get a priority transmission, what will they think if they see you like that? And if not that, I’m sure there would be something to about the lack of safety.”
What he didn’t mention was that it was having an effect on him. He couldn’t bear to have anything happen to Emily. She was his first brawn and he wasn’t about to lose her. Besides, she’s…attractive…when she sits like that. He froze mentally, hardly believing what he had just thought. But above all else shellpeople are realists and he couldn’t deny what he knew as fact.
She opened her eyes and swung her body so she was sitting normally in the chair. She tilted her head to one side and gave Tyler’s pillar a sideways glance.
“Happy? I’m still waiting for an answer Ty.”
“Why don’t you find out yourself? I’m sure you can do it. Besides, I’ve got better things to do. Like not hitting these fardling asteroids. I might be able to manage two things at a time,” he snickered at the understatement, “but there are times when I want to have total control over one thing. Like now.”
“Oh come now, its not that bad.”
“You right. Except for this fardling particle cloud we’re going through. And you know how those screws with the sensors. I’m running on visuals, and it’s not fun. Now leave me be.”
“So? I’m sure it’s easy.” Her emerald eyes glowed with an inner fire of amusement.
“Oh really? How would you like to be running through a forest blind? And trying to carry on a conversation?” Tyler asked with exasperation.
“Oh, I think it would be fun.” She replied coyly while a small grin spread across her face.
“Alright little Miss I-can-do-anything, your up, you’ve got the controls. Just remember you fardle up once and we’re dead. But just to be fair I’ll let you have full visual; it wouldn’t be fair otherwise.”
Saying so Tyler projected a real time image of the outside onto the screen. The effect was stunning. It was as though the top of the bow had disappeared and the cabin was open to space. Tyler cut the lights and shut the door to the hall. Information on speed and position were projected onto the lower right side of the display.
Asteroids were flashing past, almost to fast for human reflexes. But Emily had faster reflexes than most other humans. The manual controls, little more than a joystick, came up through the floor and Emily automatically strapped herself in. While Tyler trusted his brawn with his life, he still kept complete control over the ship. She was only a human. But Emily didn’t need to know that he still held complete control.
Tyler watched her closely as her emerald eyes narrowed.
“Oh come on Ty. You wouldn’t let me handle you. Hell, I wouldn’t let me. I’m not that stupid. Besides, it wouldn’t be good for the record.”
And that’s why I like you so, for your modesty and intelligence.
He took a risk to make her believe, nothing less would convince her. He let the ship drift to starboard, releasing some of his control for a brief instant. A large asteroid, almost half the size of the starship, was headed directly towards them. Within a second they would be smashed into small particles; she had to decide fast.
“Tyler! No! You can’t do this! I was joking! You know it, damnit! I haven’t piloted in I dunno how long! You piece of second hand sheet plated-!” the rest of her words were lost in the grunt as she was savagely yanking the stick hard to port to avoid the rock.

For the next half hour there was complete silence in the cabin other than the occasional cruses from Emily. Throughout it all Tyler was thankful for the ability to shut off his audio output sensor. If he hadn’t been able to she would have known about his joke because he couldn’t have stopped laughing.
Eventually she did make a mistake and he corrected it. At that point she sat back, realizing that she had been tricked. The lights inside the cabin came back on.
Emily looked exhausted. There was sheen of perspiration on her face. Her hair was tangled. was damp, her eyes wide. She had her eyes closed and sat breathing. Eventually she an opened an emerald eye, and looked towards Tyler.
“Well, hope someone fun. I’m going to clean up.” She said in a grumpy tone as she got up from the chair and stretched. Piloting manually through an asteroid field at speeds above .07c was an extreme mental exercise for those who we’re doing it every day of their life. And Emily wasn’t. Shaking her head to get the hair out of her eyes she walked towards the hall connecting the main cabin to the rest of the ship.
As she passed through she turned and looked back at Tyler’s pillar. A grin spread across her face and her eyes were bright.
She winked then stuck her tongue out.
She ran off giggling like a little girl towards the shower.

I have six pages, three each, on the character's backgrounds. But to clear up some...confusing aspects (praying that I don't make it even -more- confusing...)

Tyler is a brainship. While he is a human, in the sense that he has a body, it (the body) is damaged. Damaged is an understatement, if medical technology had not interved he would not have lived longer than a year.

He is encased in a "pillar", essentially a metal box, with direct sensor input/output leads to his brain (the only valuable part of his body). Technology has allowed him to control the spaceship. But in a much...deeper...sense than normal. His body is the ship's hull. He controls all the mechanical functions on the ship.

In essence, he -is- the spaceship.

Emily is a brawn, the mobile partner of Tyler. I won't go into detail here, it's not important.

I hope you enjoyed reading it.

For those who have read any of McCaffre's "Ship Who..." books, what do you think?

Thank you, I would appreciate some responses.

"Mine is the story of the end time. I know this because the third Core has been found."
-Karan S'Jet

Brain/Brawn pair of Freelancer

Post Sat Feb 12, 2005 8:17 pm

Ryan you need to give more info on the backgrounds to the characters so we can understand what is going on

Post Sat Feb 12, 2005 9:16 pm

First, I need to clear some thinks up after thinking about it. I might repeat some stuff I said earlier. Sorry.

For all intents and purposes, Tyler is a machine. He has grown up using machinery. Sight, sound, and a multitude of other (which means I can't think of them right now...) senses are only possible for him because of artifical sensors.
What he -is- lacking is the tactile sense. But don't worry, he's not depressed.

What I say next I mean in purest sincerity, so -please- don't get angry or upset with me about it.

McCafree never went into detail about what truely seperates brainships (aka shellpeople) from "normal" people, so I did. I got the idea from the physically disabled. Not those who became so from some accident became blind, but those who were -born- with it.
If you never knew about, colours, let's say (if you were born totally blind); would you -really- care about if it's a red or a blue car?
I belive the answer is no. But this is just my opinion. Now, back to the real topic.

Since he has never been touched, as he was encased (enshelled?) from birth, he would have no need to be held or for that matter, to hold. Not just that, but his training (getting there later) -conditions- him against it.
I say all this because of the last little bit of the section. When I read over it, it -seemed- a bit suggestive. So I want to clear this up.


They are just very good and very close friends. Now we arrive at the reason for the little speech at the start. They may be joined in heart, mind and soul, but they will never be together in anyway else.
Hope that helps.

Now, back to more on Tyler's...body.

As I said, he was put into his shell from birth. For his next few years (Since he doesn't need to worry about walking, eating, etc...his mental development far outstrippes normal humans.) he undergoes intense schooling; in mental health and a multitude of subjects. Basically, the next ten years of our lives (when we are born to when we leave high/senior school) is compressed into three for him. Another note, he -never- sleeps, ever (this makes up for some lost time).
Eventually, after years (16 actually) he gets moved to his permenant home, his spaceship; and becomes a brainship. As I said, he controls everything. Indoor lights, thrusters, communications, life support, etc and so forth.
Now, became he -is- a ship he can't go everywhere and he can't interact with everyone. I mean, who would -you- feel if you had to talk to a ship? So, in a very small sense, she is his avatar. But neither Emily or Tyler would think of it like that.
She is his mobile half. He is stuck with the ship, so he can't go indoors, can't shake hands (that touching thing again...) and, as stated right above, some people have difficulties talking with him. And yes, that last aspect -does- come up in the story later.

"What we feel for each other…it is not love. Not physical passion, never that. But something..."
Searching back through history he found the description he was looking for.

Soul mate.
End Quote

I wrote that. Tyler is contemplating himself and Emily.

If there is some other stuff you would like to know about, say so. Keep in mind, I will -not- post my whole story here. Unless the mods set up something that will prevent others to copy and paste, and therefore steal whole sections of my story.

"Mine is the story of the end time. I know this because the third Core has been found."
-Karan S'Jet

Brain/Brawn pair of Freelancer

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