Freelancer: Aftermath, writing the story

Sat Dec 06, 2003 6:39 pm by evilmonkey

its a nice idea, but is incredibly poorly written - the writer changing tenses midsentence, for example, and the story relying on capital letters and exclamation marks ( ZZZOOOMMMM!!!) to try and convey excitement. The spelling and grammar is dire, and there are hundreds of continuity problems, and just random events - like: he was going to die, then something ridiculous like a giant magical battleship decloaked and used its turbo cannon to pick off all the enemy then it teleported me to france.

what is more laughable is the other sycohpants who fawn over the writer - "you should write a novel, you're so good". Maybe they should try reading a real scifi novel first?

Sun Dec 07, 2003 12:13 pm by moby

Maybe they should try reading a real scifi novel first?

Dont even try comparing it to any novals. Personaly for me it fun to read it and i do read alot of real novals. It is fun to write parts of the story and yes there are many flaws but hey did i say i am Frank Herbert?

We short in hands here, are you saying you can do better? Currently we need chap 11. wanna try?

Sun Dec 07, 2003 7:07 pm by Heltak

You challenge him for no reason. Hell a few of my buddies with PUBLISHED SCI FI NOVELS laugh at this. And I'll go back to doing the same.

-~-~-~-~
There is no Silicon Heaven! But where do all the calculators go ?

You could no more evade my wrath... than you could your own shadow!

Sun Dec 07, 2003 9:56 pm by moby

You are pathetic, heltak. Mind you business, if you dont like it go away.

Sun Dec 07, 2003 11:22 pm by ???VivaHispa?a16!!!

It's interesting how Frank Herbert continues to write books after he's dead... --- RR16

whoever came up with "Mission Commision" should be lined up and shot

Mon Dec 08, 2003 7:24 pm by Orillion.

Just telling ya, for me the link to your forum is broken, it have been for days now. But it worked for me before...

Mon Dec 08, 2003 9:19 pm by moby

Yeah. Sorry for that, its been gone for 40 hours now. My host stated reason for moving but yet its been to much down time. I am working on some replacement that will be availible soon. Try that link again later.

Tue Dec 09, 2003 1:44 am by Wolf_Demon

SHUT UP WOLF!

I'm deleting every spam you make in this thread. You're on my list - behave!

Edited by - Fear Factor on 11-12-2003 09:54:55

Tue Dec 09, 2003 9:36 am by Heltak

Flame edited out

Edited by - Fear Factor on 11-12-2003 10:00:27

Edited by - Fear Factor on 11-12-2003 10:14:21

Thu Dec 11, 2003 12:32 am by Wolf_Demon

whats wrng? have nothing to say?

anyway
whats with the forum its not there still???
if ur writer is planning on having a battle in rheinland...DONT
i have the perfect part 4 that
im not finished yet tho
i thought it up in my church group cause i was bored out of my mind

Thu Dec 11, 2003 6:42 am by moby

My web hoster is dead, and i m after new one. Sorry for that.In a meanwhile I hosting it from my home http://the-sword.cjb.com

Sword_of_Devil,
www.stand.at/sword

Thu Dec 11, 2003 10:14 am by Fear Factor

Heltak, if it's crap and offends you so much, don't go there. If it's crap and yet you're still in some sick way feel the urges to bend down and smell it and then rant around "it smells like crap!" (gee, genial!) do the ranting somewhere else or just shut up.

This forum is not built to accommodate your flaming. If I close this thread down, it means you've won in hijacking it. So I'll just delete and edit every flame-ish comment you make - you cannot win . I'm watching this thread.

Mon Dec 15, 2003 6:04 pm by moby

ok, Our site is back. Powered by the ads thought.

Tue Dec 16, 2003 12:37 am by Heltak

Hey I'm not the one who got attacked here, I stated my opinion and left this is merely self defense.

-~-~-~-~
There is no Silicon Heaven! But where do all the calculators go ?

You could no more evade my wrath... than you could your own shadow!

Wed Dec 17, 2003 12:44 am by Wolf_Demon

so ur not the one who got attacked
so u r the attacker then, right?

yes i got part one of my chapter almost done
i just am getting a few names here and there from people. then i will start on part 2

EDIT: the link isnt working

Muwahahahaha!!!
I lost it!!!.....or better yet; did I ever have it?

Edited by - ):Wolf_Demon

on 17-12-2003 00:45:57

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